Today,27/02/2009, is a memorable day as it was the day that marks the end of Crisis 2 ( the end of the cold war between Winston and me). This morning, Ivan told me that i have to go to the hall immediately after school, he mentioned something regarding friendship. I thought that he meant the current problem which is between Zong Sheng and Samuel, Ivan, Jin Wei. So i asked him if the rest are going, and he said that he will tell them. So the lessons went on normally as it would, and also at the end of the English lesson, Zong Sheng asked me if the ear stick if still in his ear. I knew that he wasn't ignoring me. I was so relieved. After school, my class had to go to the biology lab 2 to collect our chromatography experiment paper. Soon, i went to the hall, i saw no one except for Winston when i was about to enter the hall. I was somehow curious about why he was there. Then i continued walking into the hall, ignoring Winston until i think i heard him calling my name. It was the first time i heard him calling me ever since Crisis 2. Thus, i stopped to wait for him. He immediately started to tell me why he ignore. he said that it was because of my attitude ( which i still need to confirm with him), e.g. when the start of Crisis 2, i said that i will not leave until he forgive me. Then he said that he wished for us to start afresh, so we shook hands and introduce ourselves. I also said that i was sorry for what i did. He also said that i shouldplay properly on next Tuesday for our Badminton. And we chatted a bit. but i can still sense a bit of uneasiness and awkardness from him as i also have that feelings. After all, we have ignored each other for almost two years.

That was the good news. But when i was walking home, the Voice asked if i will continue to be wtih the SITU Family or fully join back the Bangla Society(this refers to Santhosh that group). I have no answer to that question yet. This is a tough question and i will take some time to think about it.

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 2:57 PM



Yesterday night, when i was thinking if i can actually get help from the SITU Family members. The Voice said that i must not rely on them as they are unreliable and will just make use of me instead. It started from yesterday afternoon, when i saw them, the Voice will just keep mentioning the bad things about them. So i have no choice but to temporarily quarantine myself from them. This will be good for both parties as i may become frustrated and becomes bad towards them. I just hope that i will recover while i am temporarily with the Bangla Society.

Anyway, i heard rumours that Santhosh won the most vote for the Pioneer Student Councellors presidency. However he did not became the President as Mr Jana does not want him to be the President. There is a chance that the rumours were true. If it is true, i think i should do something about it.

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 1:59 AM

Death:

Why would a person suicide although he may be in bad health but there's still chance of recovery?
In 2007, between July to August, i already lost two of my relatives. One committed suicide by suffocating himself in his car due to owing too much debts to the bank while one was knocked unconscious in Malaysia and was burned inside the back of the car. Why do people die?

February Electric usage:

This month's electric bill was $150. I was badly reprimanded as i was blamed for using too much computer. I got nothing to say as i did really use that much. Thus i will try my best to reduce electric usage for the next month.

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 1:51 AM



We went to Samuel's house on 7th February 2009. Members includes Ivan, Kah Shin, Zong Sheng and me. When we reached there, food were almost ready. We ate our lunch slowly(actually it's quite slow as we took about 140 minutes). The last two teenager surviving the food eating battle were Kah Shin and I. After that, we played and chat until 6.00pm. that was when Samuel's mon requested that we should stay for dinner. We had noodle and a lot of other food for dinner. Again the last two survivors were kah Shin and I. There were a lot of food left this time and i could not eat that harsh again as the food from lunch were not digested yet. As i did not waste the food, i just tried to eat as much as i can. This was when the voice tells me that if i do not want to disappoint Samuel's mom, i must finish all the food. So i had no choice but to eat non-stop. However, i still cannot finish the food in the end, there were still some left. At that point of time, i felt that i have failed Samuel's mom. ( I am so useless)

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 1:46 AM



I don't know how to start the story of (C2) as it's too complicated even for me. Recently found out that one of the reason that i am not confessing to (C2) is that the two girls that i proposed before became enemies of mine and ignored me forever. I do not want the same thing to happen between (C2) and I. The Voice also said that(C2) may be imagined by me as I want to prevent myself from falling in love with other girls. Meaning: I somehow believed I love (C2). But in fact i have been able to do what true lovers do. Does that prove anything? Maybe i should really let go of her, but I tried that once and it somehow hurts.

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 7:45 PM

I wonder if everybody shows how they feel? E.g. when someone's sad, he/she will show it. In the past I may show it, but now after so much have happened to me, I will not show it, maybe a little. A few of my mottoes: Forgive & Forget; Be happy, Stay Happy; Remain Calm At All Times. Although most of them are easy to master, sometimes I will still fail. I compared how I treat my friends and how I treat my family members, the result was that I was too easy going with my friends and too hard going with my family members. E.g. it's very hard to make me lose my temper whenever my friends are around, while at home, I have very little patience and compassion for them. My hypothesis is that I spent a lot of my good to my friends, with almost nothing left for my family members. Part of me knows that it is wrong, but somehow I still want to remain this good to my friends. I want to know why. Why do I treat my friends so nice? My family taught me not to trust and depend too much on my friends. That's why I went Solo. But after I joined SITU, I did not rely on them, but somehow my emotions were affected by them. Should I change?

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 7:32 PM