Today, quite a few good things happened and I was quite glad or should I say I'm grateful for it. Hopefully, everyday is a day like today.

1) Class Chairperson
This morning as I was taking out my storybook to start my reading, Mdm Farihah (my class counselor) walked towards me and gave me a batch and asked me to sign on a paper acknowledging that I've received the badge. At that moment, I felt quite renewed and grateful for that batch as I yearned for the batch last year but there was no batch given. My next thought, it's going to be a bit more tedious for me since everyday I must wear that badge neatly ( which I am inexperienced in) and the most important thing was that I have to watch my behaviour since that badge will show all the teachers that I am a Class Chairperson. I have decided to stick to the same for Chinese lessons whereas I will filter more of my actions in other classes. Hopefully, the filter is working after some modifications made based on my theory.

2) One of the best speaker for the book sharing
My score was 9/10, but I truly don't feel that I deserve it. I was not confident as I notice that whenever my left hand is holding the script, my hand was trembling/shaking. Fortunately I always quickly switch to my left hands. As for the walking about the classroom, which the teacher mentioned as the most significant thing for my book sharing, it was fore-planned that I will do that. In fact, the plan was only done halfway as the original plan was that I will walk to the left and right corner of the back of the class. In additon, near the end of my speech, I noticed that my temperature has rose and when it was finished, I went to the washroom and discovered that my face was in slight red. I guess it must be the pressure that I had been coping with, perhaps it would have been better if I cut short my script. I totally agree with Ms Tan ( my English teacher) on one of the main flaws of my speech: my reading speed. I was slowly increasing increasing my speed without me noticing it at all until near the end of it.

3) Low Difficulty of the tests
We had chemistry test on metals and physics test on sound in the afternoon science lessons. Out of my expectation was that I was able to cope with the tests. In fact, they were not as tough as I expect them to be. This time, the things that need to remembered were stored under temporary section/ short-term memory. By revising bit by bit on the day of test, and cramping all the information one last time before the test, the information needed for the questions were then poured out and used. This technique was suggested by Voice, but I think that it will at most only work for single chapter tests and very risky to be applied on several chapters test or examinations. If the test results are good, credits goes to Voice this time round.

3) Chatting with S7 online
It's rare for her to come online, thus I try to make full use of the time we had. Although we only chatted for about 30 minutes, I was quite satisfied already. This time I shall not even summarise about the content. All I have to say is: Today is a wonderful yet tiring day.

Labels: ACTS, S7

Posted - 1:39 AM



This morning, I was informed by S7 that she told her boyfriend regarding my confession.. S7 told me that her boyfriend was not angry, but in fact he smiled when she told him the information.. This results in the guilt (that I had overcome in order for me to confess) rising up and is drowning me in it. Thus below are the conversations during my self-consultation.

X: What do you suggest that I do?
V: Follow your heart.
X: Even if it means that I will hurt others?
V: Love has no right or wrong.
X: But if possible, I will not hurt others. I do not wish for history to repeat itself.
V: If that's the case, how are you suppose to live?
V: You're living for yourself and not for others. So, go ahead and do what you think/feel is right.
X: What's right and what's wrong?
X: Hurting others is wrong...being selfish is wrong...dragging people down with you is wrong....
V: Well, that's life. Choices have consequences and part of life is to live with the consequences.
V: Life is not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
X: ...
V: Expressing your feelings ain't wrong. In fact, the other party deserves to know since it concerns him/her. So, you're doing the right thing too.
X: So you mean I have to do the wrong thing in order to do the right thing?
V: If you see it that way, I have nothing to say. But just remember not to regret what you did or what you did not do in the future.
X: What can I do now?
V: You can give up. You can wait. You can chase her using the 50% deal. You can chase her with everything you've got.
X: I'm not choosing the first choice.
V: Now we're talking.
V: I will suggest the last two.
X: With everything I' have...it's indecent right? Anyway, she won't like that either...
V: You won't know unless you try. Why shouldn't you give your full in what you do.
X: but I have to consider her side too?
V: Well, it's your call. Your decisions results in your consequences. Make the wise decision.
X: ...Thanks anyway...it's rare to see you in such a good form...
V: If I were to be good, it is a bad omen for you.

Labels: ACTS, S7

Posted - 1:38 AM



I was struck by Jin Kai's words when he said: "Where is the Kian Boon whom I know in primary school?". Without much hesitation or thoughts over it I told him: " The past me has been deleted.". This was however true as I only stored data memories from the past and nothing else. Recently, I began to think about how much I've changed and whether or not it has been for the good or for the worse. Did I become better after each change or did I become worse after each change? According to my observations, my filter for my non-mother tongue lessons is weakening rapidly. This means that my status in mother tongue lessons are beginning to spread to other lessons. I am still figuring out ways to repair the filter and I to do it fast as time's running out for me since the spreading is happening very quickly.

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 1:35 AM



After we've messaged with each other for quite some time, I have just confessed to her tonight.

By me:
So, have you figured out the curious question? Let's see how imaginative you can be. Answer key's not provided. (Haha)

By S7:
I've got a feeling It's got something to do with me, That's why you don't want top tell me. XD

By me:
Uh...i'll tell you what it is as it's heavy after keeping it inside me for this long...But can you assure me that you will ignore it if you find it offensive?

By S7:
Okay, shoot! Tell me.

By T2:
If you're not assured enough yet, I'm not that petty, and I love looking from other people's perspectives, so don't worry, I won't be offended. XD

By me:
Truth is: I LIKE YOU. No, it's: I LOVE YOU. I have FALLEN FOR YOU. At first, i treated as my sis, but later, i started to MISS YOU. I can't wait to BE WITH YOU. TIME FLIES whenever we're together. Even now, i CAN'T WAIT to be with you. But i know, i should not tell you this as you
have ********.

By S7:
Why do i get the feeling that I've known this all along? Call it female intuition i guess. XD don't worry, i won't hate you or nything. Just to reassure you, if i didn't already have ********, i'd have you, kay? XD besaides ********you're the only other guy as close, and that's not easy, cuz i've only known you for about half a year. XD don't worry about anything kay? This ain't gonna change anything. XD

By me:
Really? Okay, it's been a long time since i've been as happy as now. Thank you so much. I'll wait for you. I love you. Haha, i'm so glad to confess at last.

By S7:
.... You guys are mad... Seriously, i don't see that much in myself. I'm loud, annoying and completely violent. XD what's there to love?? XD you guys are weird.

By me:
Love does not need a reason. You love people for who they are. You are who you are, that's why you're unique. We unexplainable fall in love with you. I love you.

By S7:
... Like i said, you guys are both weird. XD and i suppose i am too... Weird people attract weird people.... XD what can i say? I feel... Um... Loved? XD

By me:
It's good to feel loved. Also, you're not weird. Because you are who you are, that's what make you special. So, how does it feel to have another person loving you?

By S7:
Scary. In one word. XD but i suppose i can deal with it. XD and i'm weird... I mix around with guys more than girls.. XD

By me:
I'm thankful to everyone who let us meet with each other.

By S7:
Lol... You people are scary. This sounds familiar. You guys said the same thing, only different scenario.

By me:
Really? Wow... Haha... Well, sorry but my parents wants me to sleep now for tomorrow's reunion dinner. You should sleep soon too. Good night...I LOVE YOU.

By S7:
Omg don't talk about dinner. They are going to feed me non-stop for the next 4 days. XD good luck with that, and good night!

By me:
Remember, exercise more. I can't wait to see you again. I miss you so much. If you do not mind, pls do tell me whenever i can call you. Good night. I love you.

By S7:
Exercise more, sure... XD ya la, ya la, sleep la you lovesick psycho.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Voice: I've told you how to make use of this version, the rest will be up for you to discover.

Labels: ACTS, S7

Posted - 1:34 AM



Allen:
I have confirmed the identity of S7. That's what the data side of me says.
I have confirmed the person whom I love. That's what the emotions side of me says.

Well...I did not know that it was her all this time...I did not know when it started...but I guess I did not expect myself to fall for her. But even with that, I'm still considering whether or not to confess...as she already has a boyfriend. It would be cruel for me to unstable the both of them. But I cannot fully control my emotions now...as they are starting to grow stronger and stronger. My logic cannot suppress it for any much longer...

Voice:
To simply put it: Your resistance is futile.
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. Only now do you see difference in superiority between us. I'm always right. Your logic judged you as guilty if you were to give up on C2, as you have promised to wait for her. But it is just purely logic, negating your inner feelings. You should credit me for all the works that I've done for you.

Labels: ACTS, C2, S7

Posted - 1:31 AM



So, the journey to C2 concluded with a bad ending. But not to worry, for it spells the beginning of a new journey. Now, it's time to search for the new person: S7. I wonder where I can find this person, but I promised to Voice that I will use my feelings (on my own without Voice's assistance) for this search. My social contacts is quite limited, thus I think it should be somewhere inside. If that's the case, the search will be so much simpler.

Labels: ACTS, S7

Posted - 1:30 AM



Well, last this was what happened last night:

By me at 11:28p.m.:
I apologise for irritating & sickening you all these while. I shall stop all these nonsense once and for all. Is that alright with you?

From C2 at 11.31p.m.:
ok

From that message, data interpreted was that she agrees that what I did all these while were nonsense. Thus that was enough to convince that minor part of me to give up on C2. Resulting in the end of the C2 era. A rush of different flows through me currently causing me to be ambivalent: despair, sadness, excitement, happiness, serenity, disappointment and some more.

Right now, I shall rely on Voice's Near-Instant Recovery plan (even though I have yet to know what that plan is). Hopefully, I will get back to normal in a short while with that.

Labels: ACTS, C2

Posted - 1:29 AM



Well, tomorrow I will be going for the Flag Day as part of my CIP programme for my badminton CCA. But just today, I have received news that the secondary 3-5 Gu Zheng CCA members are also participating the flag day. That spells trouble since C2 is likely to be there too and the current simulation results shows that I am not suitable to have contact with her right now. Perhaps I am beginning to be affected by Voice, but no matter what, I do not feel comfortable with the presence of C2. I guess the message really hit me quite hard, but hopefully all of these are not due to hatred.

Labels: ACTS, C2

Posted - 1:28 AM






The Left Brain VS Right Brain test ... do you see the dancer turning clockwise or anti-clockwise?

If clockwise, then you use more of the right side of the brain and vice versa.

Most of us would see the dancer turning anti-clockwise though you can try to focus and change the direction; see if you can do it.

Are you very organized? Do you believe that there is a right way and a wrong way to do everything? If so, you may be left-brain dominant.

Characteristics of Left Brain Students

* You probably work with a To-Do list
* You like to be the critic in class
* You're good at math or science
* You are rational and logical
* Your research is precise and well-documented
* You set goals for yourself
* You can interpret information well
* Your room is orderly
* You can answer questions spontaneously
* You follow directions and you do read directions (unlike some people)
* You aren't touchy-feely
* You can listen to a long lecture without losing patience
* You don’t let feelings get in your way
* You like action movies
* You read sitting up
* Your words are precise

Your Classes

* In history class, you are able to remember dates and processes.
* In math class, you enjoy going through a long calculation.
* You like the order of science.
* In English class, you have a good understanding of grammar and sentence structure.

Advice for Left Brain Students

* Study in a quiet room
* You can do math but get impatient trying to explain it to someone who struggles—so don’t volunteer to be a tutor unless you know you have the patience
* You like to lead in a study group, so go ahead and volunteer
* Join a debate team or academic competition
* Try to excel at the science fair. You can be a winner
* Take advantage of your skills in math and science
* Choose non-fiction reading
* You prefer factual questions and assignments, as opposed to open-ended questions
* You can organize your notes well, so you should
* Keep your room organized
* Don’t argue with the teacher too much
* Choose to do analytical essays
* Work alone when you have a choice. You get frustrated with others who "clown around”
* Avoid "free thinking” teachers if they confuse you
* Take more risks. Don’t be afraid to be creative

You might be a finalist on Jeopardy some day!

Do you get bored when teachers lecture too much? Do you feel like you can size up people easily by watching them? If so, you may be right-brain dominant.

Characteristics of Right-Brain Students

* You take notes but lose them. You may have a hard time keeping track of your research
* You might have a hard time making up your mind
* You are good with people
* You don't fall for practical jokes as easily as some
* You seem dreamy, but you're really deep in thought
* People may have told you you're psychic
* You like to write fiction, draw, or play music
* You might be athletic
* You like mystery stories
* You take time to ponder and you think there are two sides to every story
* You may lose track of time
* You are spontaneous
* You’re fun and witty
* You may find it hard to follow verbal directions
* You are unpredictable
* You get lost
* You are emotional
* You don't like reading directions
* You may listen to music while studying
* You read lying down
* You may be interested in "the unexplained”
* You are philosophical

Your Classes

* In history class, you enjoy the social aspects most. You like to explore the effects of things that happened in history. You like the essays, too.
* You can do well in math class if you apply yourself, but you get bored doing long problems.
* Science? Boring.
* You do well in English class, especially when it comes to reading literature and writing essays about books. You also do well in creative writing assignments.

Advice for Right Brain Students

* Choose to do personal essays
* Watch your daydreaming—keep it under control
* Let your imagination work for you in the arts
* Let your intuition work for you in social situations
* Let your deep thinking work for you during essay tests—but don’t ponder too long
* Be creative with essays. You can use colorful language well
* Use images and charts when you study
* Write down directions
* Try to be more organized!
* Don’t be overly suspicious of others
* Make outlines to organize your thoughts.
* Choose fiction in reading assignments
* Try to avoid teachers who lecture a lot; choose teachers who use activities
* You tell stories well, so write some!
* Put information into categories for better understanding
* Avoid getting bogged down by thinking of all possibilities when answering questions
* Finish things! You have so much talent, but you don’t always complete things.

You have great instincts and survival skills. If you study hard, you might be a finalist on Survivor one day!

Labels: ACTS

Posted - 1:26 AM

Looks like you're still pondering over the matter, it's time to move on from here and continue with your life. There are so much things out there waiting for us, so why are you still stuck in this obstacles. Get over it and move on. C2's sending you the message that it's hopeless for you to carry on. So, why don't you give it up. Don't you always wish to do what she wants? Right now she wants you to stop, so why are you still hesitating about what to do?

Stop trying to act as if everything is okay. Since your emotions are up, you should not hold everything inside you. You should let it all out as you can never wrap a fire with a paper. From this, you should have collected quite some data which should be sufficient to satisfy your logic for the time being. And if you wish go to recover state, why don't we switch? The conditions are negotiable.

Labels: ACTS, C2

Posted - 1:26 AM

I do not know how to describe yesterday...Not even till now...All I can say is: Strange things came and went, leaving me in agony...

4.41 p.m.:
From C2:
" Oi this will be my last and final msg for u. do u know that whatever you do is very sickening and irritating .i "

6.03 p.m.:
From Me:
" Calyn, did you just sms me at 4p.m. + ? "

6.11 p.m.:
From C2:
" Yeah yes "

7.14 p.m.:
From Me:
" And do you truly mean every word that you said? Anyway, the message looks incomplete. is there anything that you wish to add on? "

7.21 p.m.:
From C2:
" Nvm forget it "

7.24 p.m.:
From Me:
" Huh? So, mind telling me what that is all about? Please, as I am confused right now. I'm also disturbed by that message. "

However things just end like this as there was no reply from C2...I wonder what's going on in C2's mind...Right now, I still have not get the gist of the situation...

Well, here is where the logic comes in. Below is the list of possible reason for the message thought up by Voice and I:

1) C2 wants to come clear me to stop as meant truly in that message but could not bear to do so in the past.
2) C2 wants to test me, but I think this is quite unlikely.
3) C2's phone was hijacked.
4) C2 has decided that I am of no use to her and has began to find me a nuisance.

Labels: ACTS, C2

Posted - 1:24 AM